When parents of young children divorce amicably, it is likely that both parents will be able to maintain close relationships with their children, even when one parent has primary physical custody. But it cannot be denied that the situation has changed for non-custodial parents, who do not see their children nearly as often as they used to. The change can put a strain on the parent-child relationship. The trauma of divorce may cause the child to blame one parent, which can cause resentment that lasts for years.
That makes it important to use what time you have with your children to maintain and even strengthen the bonds between you. Here are some tips for minimizing the impact divorce can have on the parent-child relationship:
? Play. Participate in activities your children like. For younger children, this could mean coloring or playing with toys. Playing video games with teenage children is a good way to spend time with them doing something they enjoy.
? Talk, but don't force it. Children do not like being forced to talk about their feelings, so talk about subjects that they bring up and wait for the divorce to come up naturally. Show you understand their feelings. They may not want to talk much at first, so it is important that you work to maintain open communication, even if it is only one-sided for a while.
? Show up. This means going to the child's games and school plays. Watching your child perform makes him or her feel loved.
Source: Huffington Post, "Don't Divorce Your Kids," Nancy Fagan, Feb. 2, 2012
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